The Aiglet

Editorial illustration showing generational wealth gap: millennials navigating financial obstacles while boomers sit comfortably

Winners Of Trump's 'Patriot Games' To Receive Affordable Housing, Pension

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump unveiled his highly anticipated “Patriot Games” competition Thursday, a nationwide spectacle …

Editorial illustration of a red-faced senator playing Candy Crush on a tablet in a grand office, while aides peek in and whisper.

DOJ accidentally livestreams Senator's level 456 Candy Crush attempt

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a landmark move for government transparency that quickly morphed into a national crisis of oversharing, the Department of …

A Waymo car's infotainment screen showing an extra fee for a newborn baby against a blurred background of exhausted parents holding the infant.

Waymo Charges Newborn 'Extra Rider' Fee After In-Car Birth, Waives Car Seat Violation

SAN FRANCISCO — Waymo defended its decision Tuesday to automatically charge a local couple an “Extra Rider Fee” after their son was born …

FBI agents confusedly pointing at a blank whiteboard labeled Antifa Org Chart

FBI Demands To Speak With Antifa's Manager

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a sweeping initiative that baffled legal experts and terrified administrative assistants, the Federal Bureau of Investigation …

Secretary of State at podium surrounded by typography samples, shouting at a Helvetica letter

Rubio's Serif Restoration Act: "If It Doesn't Have Feet, How Do You Know Where It Stands?"

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Secretary of State Marco Rubio just announced the “Serif Restoration Act,” sending foreign ministers scrambling to …

FDA officials arranging organic pasta boxes with biohazard symbols on a conference table

FDA Launches 'Organic Russian Roulette' Initiative to Promote 'Food Mindfulness' Following Deadly Listeria Outbreak

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Following a devastating listeriosis outbreak that killed eleven people and hospitalized dozens more, the FDA announced today its …

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