The Aiglet

Cold War propaganda poster-style photograph of Santa Claus as a noir wanted poster, surrounded by classified documents, Pentagon plans, and Greenland maps connected by red string

The Keep Christmas Safe Act: Congress Accidentally Bans Santa Claus, Triggers International Crisis

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In what felt like a C-SPAN fever dream, Congress passed the “Keep Christmas Safe Act” with overwhelming bipartisan …

Editorial illustration showing generational wealth gap: millennials navigating financial obstacles while boomers sit comfortably

Trump's "Patriot Games" to Award Winners Affordable Housing, Pensions, Other Relics of Boomer Economy

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump unveiled his highly anticipated “Patriot Games” competition Thursday, a nationwide spectacle …

Editorial illustration of a red-faced senator playing Candy Crush on a tablet in a grand office, while aides peek in and whisper.

DOJ accidentally livestreams Senator's level 456 Candy Crush attempt

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a landmark move for government transparency that quickly morphed into a national crisis of oversharing, the Department of …

A Waymo car's infotainment screen showing an extra fee for a newborn baby against a blurred background of exhausted parents holding the infant.

Waymo Charges Newborn 'Extra Rider' Fee After In-Car Birth, Waives Car Seat Violation

SAN FRANCISCO — Waymo defended its decision Tuesday to automatically charge a local couple an “Extra Rider Fee” after their son was born …

FBI agents confusedly pointing at a blank whiteboard labeled Antifa Org Chart

FBI Launches Nationwide Manhunt for 'Antifa's Manager,' Demands to Speak to Corporate

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a sweeping initiative that baffled legal experts and terrified administrative assistants, the Federal Bureau of Investigation …

Secretary of State at podium surrounded by typography samples, shouting at a Helvetica letter

Rubio's Serif Restoration Act: "If It Doesn't Have Feet, How Do You Know Where It Stands?"

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Secretary of State Marco Rubio just announced the “Serif Restoration Act,” sending foreign ministers scrambling to …

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